Belief...

In a small town, a person decided to open up a brothel, which was
right opposite to a church. The church & its congregation started a
campaign to block the brothel from opening with petitions and prayeb
daily against his business.

Work progressed. However, when it was almost complete and was about to
open a few days later, a strong lightning struck the brothel and it
was burnt to the ground.

The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till
the brothel owner sued the church authorities on the grounds that the
church through its congregation & prayers was ultimately responsible
for the destruction of his brothel, either through direct or indirect
actions or means.

In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all
responsibility or any connection that their prayers were reasons for
the act of God. As the case made its way into court, the judge looked
over the paperwork at the hearing and commented:

'I don't know how I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from
the paperwork, we have a brothel owner who believes in the power of
prayer and we have an entire church that doesn't.'

                  Chaudhry Ahmed Khan
                  Advocate High Courts
                  Cell: 0300 2172379 

FW: Go Green

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                                                Go Green

   

When at a store checkout, the young cashier suggested to the older woman that she should bring her own shopping bags in future because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.

The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have this green thing back in my earlier days."

The cashier responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations."

She was right -- our generation didn't have the green thing in its day. Back then, we returned milk bottles, pop bottles and beer bottles to the shop. The shop sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got blunt.
But we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every shop and office building. We walked to the shop and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two streets. 
But she was right. We didn't have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby's nappies because we didn't have the throw-away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 2200watts -- wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. 
But that young lady is right. We didn't have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the county of Yorkshire. In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the post, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not polystyrene or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn petrol just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. 
But she's right. We didn't have the green thing back then.

We drank water from a fountain or a tap when we were thirsty instead of demanding a plastic bottle flown in from another country. We accepted that a lot of food was seasonal and didn't expect to have out of season products flown thousands of air miles around the world. We actually cooked food that didn't come out of a packet, tin or plastic wrapping and we could even wash our own vegetables and chop our own salad. 
But we didn't have the green thing back then.

Back then, people caught a train or a bus, and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their mothers into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical socket in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza place.
But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we oldies were just because we didn't have the green thing back then?

(from another selfish old person who needed a lesson in conservation from a smart-"aleck" young person.

                              Chaudhry Ahmed Khan
                                         Advocate High Courts
 
                                        Cell: 0300 2172379

__.

Judge gives reasons for `My Lord`s` stay 

LAHORE, Sept 19: The judges have never issued any command or instruction to members of the legal fraternity to necessarily address the judges with the terms `My Lord` or `Your Lordship` says a detailed judgment issued by Justice Nasir Saeed Sheikh on a writ petition against the use of the said titles. On Sept 11, the judge had announced a short order and dismissed the petition.

A local lawyer had filed the petition through Advocate A.K Dogar and also challenged the act of bowing by lawyers while entering the courtrooms, and the placing of seats of judges at a raised platform.

In the detailed judgment, Justice Sheikh has addressed all the points raised by the petitioner with historical background and meaning of the impugned tittles described by many dictionaries.

The judge said this courteous and respectful form of address has its origins in the British judicial system. It has not been `found through any source of legal literature that even the British members of the bar ever addressed thejudges with the term `My Lord` and `Your Lordship` with an attribution of placing the judges near to the concept of `God Almighty,` the judge remarked.

He pointed out that the petitioner`s counsel did not raise any argument nor produced any material in writing contrary to this historical fact.

Justice Sheikh referred to different English language dictionaries. He said the word `Lord` in its ordinary meanings has reference to qualities of ability, nobility and learning of the person who are appointed as judges of superior courts.

Such practice of the bar members cannot be directed to be discontinued by an order passed by this court as prayed by the petitioner on religious grounds, the judge said.

As far as the concept of expressing the gesture of respect towards the seat of a Justice by a person entering and leaving the courtroom is concerned, the judge said it has no reference to demonstrating a conduct of worship which is unequivocally reserved for Allah Almighty.

`The bending of head be-fore the judges in the courtroom is a customary practice for showing respect,` the judge remarked and added if every lawyer who enters the courtroom start uttering the word `Assallam-o-Alaikum` loudly throughout the day, the entire proceedings of the court will be disturbed.

As far as the objection by the petitioner about placing the seat of judges at a higher pedestal in courts was concerned, Justice Sheikh said it was only for symbolic display of authority of courts different from the ordinary people.

`This placement of the seat reflects the intention of the law givers that when a person performing the functions of the governments appears before the court of law on complaint lodged by a private person must have an impression that he is appearing before an authority superior to that functionary,` the judge maintained.

`In view of all the above detailed reasons, I do not find any merits in the instant writ petition instituted by the petitioner which is hereby dismissed,` the judgment concluded.

Doo-Bai

Chaudhry Ahmed Khan
  Advocate High Courts
     Cell: 0300 2172379

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The Dubai Nobody Tells You About Dubai is the land of the biggest, tallest, longest, widest, richest, fanciest, fastest...everything is t... in the world. They have the tallest residential towers in the world, the tallest restaurant in the world, the largest number of Malbaris in the world, the highest crane operator in the world. If it does not grow in Dubai, they' ll make it artificially - artificial ski slopes, artificial islands, artificial oasis, coconut trees and lawns, artificial beaches, artificial economy. Indians especially love it here because of the dirham-to-rupee value. Pakistanis adore it. The Egyptians come here because there is nothing to do in Egypt. No more pyramids to build either. The Filipinos come here because they have no choice; theres nothing back home, not even dogs - they've been eaten up. The Brits come here coz they have forgotten what it is to enjoy 3 meals a day in UK and nobody employs them there for the crap they give. . The Lebanese come here to buy cars, dress to kill, wear Peter Pan shoes 10 sizes bigger than their feet, put 1 kg of gel on their heads and give everyone ball talk. They'll buy a 1980s Merc or BMW for 10k dirhams and drive the car like theyre sitting in the rear passenger seat, stretching their arms all the way to the steering wheel, giving you the piercing bald eagle look. Russian girls come here for "fun". The Bangladeshis come here to serve you when you honk outside a Baklava (shop), but would not even look at you if you park and go inside to pickup yourself. Now according to the government Dubai is Tax free. Of course, that is true. You only have to pay for the visa, medical, sponser, insurance, resident ID, Opening a bank account or even closing an account, Municipality, Sewerage, attestation of papers, translation of papers, driving license papers, lessons, Car license, testing, and .... but the salary is Tax Free. Only, there is a Pay and Park scheme with 5000 parking lots, and 500,000 cars in the city, so where the hell do you park? And you are fined for wrong parking. Toll has been introduced on many roads. You can avoid the toll tax by using alternative routes, but you'll end up in a traffic jam because everyone is trying to avoid the toll tax. If you have any government related work like medicals for visa or immigration, you have 2 options - Standard and Urgent Procedure. Standard takes 15 days and Urgent takes 2 days. The difference is 30 to 40-odd dirhams. Everyone goes for the urgent option and the Dubai government makes money, urgently. If you switch jobs you get a work ban and to lift the ban you pay a huge penalty. In Dubai, without a car you are paralyzed (you dont even get jobs if you dont have a car). But you 'll get your license in attempts ranging from 2 to 20. Each time you fail you have paid fees for Driving classes & Driving Tests, which are 1000-odd dirhams. Imagine the money RTA makes. Most of the expats live alone with families back home. So they spend much on phone calls. And call charges from Dubai are high. Another odd thing about Dubai - no matter where you go or who you meet, you take down phone numbers. Everybody has everybodys number in Dubai. And everyone has a Visiting Card, whether you are a bootlegger, a masseuse, a hooker, a car cleaner, a watchman or a pizza delivery boy. Everyone knocks around with lots of cards in his or her wallet and one card in the palm. So whenever you shake hands with anyone in Dubai and let go, you end up with a visiting card in your palm. If youre walking on the road and you ask someone the time, he'll tell you 10:30, give you his card and say, I have new and second-hand watches. At a restaurant when you are leaving they'll say Here is my card, call us for home delivery. If you're below your building, you'll meet those Chinese chicks giving you their cards, saying, Call us if you want DVDs. If youre standing at a bus stop, a Pakistani will pull over in his 1980 Toyota Corolla, give you his card and say, If you want Pick-up & Drop Service, call me. Dubai has amusing-looking buildings. Some have holes in them, some have giant balls on them, some look like aeroplanes, some look like sail boats, and, all of them reach into space with your window right in front of the moon. Everyone in Dubai goes to malls. Not necessarily to shop. To beat the heat, go to a mall; business meeting, go to a mall; getting bored, go to a mall; want to take a leak or dump, go to a mall; want to do lukhagiri (little in your pocket, little in your mind), go to a mall. If you want to go for a picnic go to a mall. Some Malbaris go home to Kerala, get married, and then come to a Dubai Mall for their honeymoon. THAT...MY FRIENDS.....ISDOO-BAI

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